Thank you for reading Toni. So grateful to get to experience your heart and presence. I have such deep appreciation for the elders that I get to walk with, who through their reflection of life, I can come to a deeper understanding of myself and these phases that I’m moving through. Sending love to you.
This story made an impression on me as I'm living with my mom who is in a similar situation as you are, where she is caretaking her mother with Alzheimer's. I admire the patient and grounded way you are approaching a frustrating situation, which is not the way my mom is doing it, lol. Being in my mid-late twenties, I feel so frustrated living at home so close to the patterns that wounded me deeply, and am claiming my space to heal and figure out my own sh*t. Thank you for affirming that it's not selfish to move far away from home even though Asian familial duty calls. Congratulations on making this decision for yourself and modeling the courage that we all need to go along with unexpected turning points in our ives.
Ah I hear you so much Yaerin. The frustration is real. For me, it felt like my wings were being clamped down when I just wanted to spread them out and see where they would take me. I’m realizing it’s out of a desperate need to protect and keep me safe that my mom’s overprotective energy felt so stifling. It was her fear and distrust in the world that kept me contorted. So for my self-preservation, I needed distance and space. To also be living with the energy of a frustrated caregiver is also challenging in its own right too. That role is far from easy. My mom was incredibly impatient and short-fused when she was my grandmother’s caregiver. I have already told my brother that when the time comes, we will need to hire additional help to just maintain our own wellbeing. I acknowledge the situation you are in—it’s difficult. Trust that your mom is doing the very best she can right now. And whatever you can do to soften towards her might also help her to soften towards your grandmother too. I say that with the full knowing that that might seem like an impossible task too. You’re doing the best you can. So give yourself grace too.
Thank you for sharing this with us. I am deeply moved by your telling of your journey with your mom.
Thank you for reading Toni. So grateful to get to experience your heart and presence. I have such deep appreciation for the elders that I get to walk with, who through their reflection of life, I can come to a deeper understanding of myself and these phases that I’m moving through. Sending love to you.
This story made an impression on me as I'm living with my mom who is in a similar situation as you are, where she is caretaking her mother with Alzheimer's. I admire the patient and grounded way you are approaching a frustrating situation, which is not the way my mom is doing it, lol. Being in my mid-late twenties, I feel so frustrated living at home so close to the patterns that wounded me deeply, and am claiming my space to heal and figure out my own sh*t. Thank you for affirming that it's not selfish to move far away from home even though Asian familial duty calls. Congratulations on making this decision for yourself and modeling the courage that we all need to go along with unexpected turning points in our ives.
Ah I hear you so much Yaerin. The frustration is real. For me, it felt like my wings were being clamped down when I just wanted to spread them out and see where they would take me. I’m realizing it’s out of a desperate need to protect and keep me safe that my mom’s overprotective energy felt so stifling. It was her fear and distrust in the world that kept me contorted. So for my self-preservation, I needed distance and space. To also be living with the energy of a frustrated caregiver is also challenging in its own right too. That role is far from easy. My mom was incredibly impatient and short-fused when she was my grandmother’s caregiver. I have already told my brother that when the time comes, we will need to hire additional help to just maintain our own wellbeing. I acknowledge the situation you are in—it’s difficult. Trust that your mom is doing the very best she can right now. And whatever you can do to soften towards her might also help her to soften towards your grandmother too. I say that with the full knowing that that might seem like an impossible task too. You’re doing the best you can. So give yourself grace too.